April 2016 Reset

when i look back on all relationships i had, there is always one thing in common. you gave the whole fucking self and yet been treated like you are not that effin' important. you run over them ; follow them wherever they might be and have been left in the middle . from a so called perfect escape; to another sweet escape; to another journey of foolishness and now inside a house that u wish will be home yet it's not. i told myself if ever i will have a family , i will place much effort to keep my partner upclose and my kid should have more time; > you can have no job but have an expensive love of labor for your kid > you can have no friends since you are building your family > you have to close your doors to opportunity just to let your partner build his own success > you can let everyone pull you down as long as you know that you are standing for what you belive in.. before i can make things happen... why can't i do it again? > hindrance will be - unsupportive husband - a family that follows you or wants to know every single thing about you - a member of the so called family who is much insecure on what your life was back then since she got a boring life - a very looking forward mother in law who thinks she knows evrything that meddles your parenting - a company who don't know what life you have given up just to please them these things, i never felt it on my previous family - mother of a 3rd sex who loves me so much - an ex family who supports your decision since its your own family - a supportive man who will do anything to his family just to see you happy contentment? all of us never had it. we seek for so called happiness and looking for pieces that will complete a puzzle yet it never fix the situation. so starting tonight -i won't run over a person who don't know my families worth - i will be civilized enough to treat the people around me on the way they should be treated - will never open up my life , my happiness to anyone who will just gossip to make herself popular or being pitied - will focus more on what will make me happy despite of looking on scenarios that make me sad -will be providing less value for those who never value what i have given to them.. time; money; effort; life hahah feel free to check on my online diary and i'll guarantee you ; you will have another topic to discuss with your so called friends and bff.. fuck you bitch.. your fb name fits you hahahah